Episode 163
Redefining success – Vision Tribe Summit 2025
Carlos, Laurence, and Lana present the first session in their Vision Tribe Summit from February 2025.
In this session they explore four key dimensions of success:
- Finding ways to earn while doing what you love rather than chasing wealth at the expense of fulfilment
- Prioritising what genuinely energises you rather than constant multitasking driven by feelings of "not-enoughness"
- Surrounding yourself with people who energise you and share your values
- Creating ripple effects by simply being your authentic self rather than trying to change the world through effort
Links
Transcript
Over this following week, we are going to be taking you through a little
Speaker:bit of a journey, uh, a little bit of a meander through some of the ideas
Speaker:and, uh, approaches that we share with participants of our Vision 2020 program.
Speaker:All in service of this idea of building the business from the
Speaker:inside out, aligning what would you do with who you are so that.
Speaker:Work becomes less effort, effortful, uh, and you create, uh, more
Speaker:excitement and joy for the future that you wanna create for yourself.
Speaker:And so we're gonna talk today about this idea of redefining success.
Speaker:Uh, and we're gonna talk about it through the lenses of, well, four
Speaker:different lenses, money, time.
Speaker:Connection and impact.
Speaker:Uh, and we are talking about the contrast between what money means to
Speaker:people in terms of success, going from accumulation to flow, uh, what time
Speaker:means to people in terms of success, going from productivity and efficiency
Speaker:to presence and prioritization.
Speaker:And then there's how we talk about connection and going from this idea
Speaker:of customers and followers and, and status to real idea of like
Speaker:community and authentic connection.
Speaker:And being seen and seeing others who they are.
Speaker:And the final thing, the final lens is impact.
Speaker:And going from this idea of doing and making and and forcing impact to being the
Speaker:change, to modeling the change, to living the change and to be a guide, to be a
Speaker:part of a system of change where you are part of a group of people creating change.
Speaker:So we're gonna talk, uh, about these four different lenses,
Speaker:four different contrasts.
Speaker:We have our own take on this, uh, and Laurence and Lana and I. We'll
Speaker:share our own stories of what each of these redefinitions of success mean
Speaker:to us, and then how that relates to how we're trying to share that with
Speaker:people on our Vision 2020 program.
Speaker:So, given all that, where, uh, where will you like to take this first Lala?
Speaker:I'm glad that you already shared the different, uh, areas where
Speaker:we find redefining success.
Speaker:So for me, I. Immediately, immediately go to connection.
Speaker:And how my story is around success has been redefined with, uh, my
Speaker:first experience with breast cancer.
Speaker:That's more than 10 years ago.
Speaker:where the question for me was of how would I want to use my limited time, my limited
Speaker:energy, and um, my limited attention, you know, because that is for all of us.
Speaker:We have.
Speaker:Limited time, energy, and attention.
Speaker:Uh, no matter if you're healthy or sick, you know, we have a finite amount of that.
Speaker:And, uh, during that period, for me it was really evident that, for me to, uh,
Speaker:be able to engage in the ways that I would want to engage would mean I would have
Speaker:to redefine who I interact with, who I engage with, and who I collaborate with.
Speaker:And that was also the time when I was searching that I got connected with
Speaker:you, Carlos, and we got started to working with a happy startup community.
Speaker:And then five years ago we started Vision 2020.
Speaker:So, so for me, when I started redefining success base from, um, who I'm
Speaker:engaging with, who are in my circles of connection, it really shifted a lot
Speaker:in terms of how I'd want to show up.
Speaker:Um, what projects I take in, you know, what projects I collaborate on.
Speaker:And, um, and just also enjoy those collaborations because then I get to be
Speaker:with people that I love and that I respect and that inspires me and I. Funny enough.
Speaker:Yeah, those kinds of collaborations don't need any, you know, paperwork,
Speaker:don't need any, any contracts.
Speaker:No lawyers have, uh, come into our relationship yet.
Speaker:Exactly, exactly right.
Speaker:So it's interesting how, um, just because having the right
Speaker:relationships and connections can bring so much abundance and bring
Speaker:so much impact as well in my life.
Speaker:So for me, Redefining success based on who I engage with and who I want to
Speaker:nourish in terms of relationship, has, uh, created so much abundance in my life.
Speaker:How about you, Laurence?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So if I think about me now, I think, or even me, maybe five years ago, I,
Speaker:I would say the same, like gravitating to the people who give me energy.
Speaker:You know, that energy exchange you get with.
Speaker:Connecting with the right people.
Speaker:and also knowing that the, the energy that can drain from you if you are,
Speaker:if you are with the wrong people.
Speaker:Um, but actually I think if I think about a big thing that shifted my thinking
Speaker:about success was probably about 25 years ago actually, which I think community
Speaker:came as a result of this, but it was really focused on the happy money part.
Speaker:Um, so focused on this feeling that.
Speaker:If I pursue the thing that I'm good at or the thing that I think I should do
Speaker:here, IEI did a degree in economics.
Speaker:Um, I should probably go and work in the city.
Speaker:I should probably get a good job and have a good salary.
Speaker:That makes sense given the career ladder I'm on.
Speaker:Um, and then tried that.
Speaker:And then after a few months it was quite clear that that just wasn't for me.
Speaker:Like I was in an environment where everyone ahead of me was earning way more.
Speaker:was a lot more successful in theory.
Speaker:Um, but actually they weren't selling this idea of this measure of success anyway.
Speaker:For me, it was much more about work, was everything.
Speaker:They worked all the hours.
Speaker:They seemed quite unhappy generally, even though they had
Speaker:nice houses and nice things.
Speaker:but I think more importantly, I was, I was of this belief that actually I'm
Speaker:a human being at the heart of this.
Speaker:And if I can make money doing something I actually love doing rather than.
Speaker:Something I, I'm good at.
Speaker:Then maybe longer term I'll actually be better off, not just financially,
Speaker:but in lots of other ways.
Speaker:So I probably had my midlife crisis age 23, I think, um, which actually led me
Speaker:on this path to eventually working with Carlos and then starting our agency
Speaker:and then eventually meeting you and, and working with you over the last five
Speaker:years in the program, as well as all the other wonderful people in the community.
Speaker:So that community to me has come as a result of a commitment to.
Speaker:Happiness ultimately through work.
Speaker:And that was, that was a big shift for me was like, um, even if I don't make
Speaker:the money that I will do in this career, certainly at the start, at least I know
Speaker:if I follow the path of curiosity, then actually I'm gonna be more fulfilled
Speaker:and stay in the game ultimately, rather than burnout, which I would've headed
Speaker:for if I'd stayed in that career.
Speaker:So, yeah, at that time, that was learning how to build websites and who knew, who
Speaker:knew that would lead to where we are now.
Speaker:Nice.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:How about you?
Speaker:Um, yeah, going from a crisis to Chrysalis I think is, that thing is like, rather
Speaker:than it like, ah, how, how do we see this all as a, as a process of transformation?
Speaker:Uh, and I think these four lenses for me just helps.
Speaker:What I've seen helps us just make sense of what this transformation is about.
Speaker:Uh, what are these two polarities that we might be dancing between?
Speaker:Um, I'm gonna talk about actually time and impact, um, and particularly around time
Speaker:going from this kind of, from metrics to meaning, from, from having a really being
Speaker:effective with a to-do list to actually.
Speaker:Doing meaning spending meaningful time on things, which means being
Speaker:present, not trying to multitask.
Speaker:And, and that multitasking thing I think comes well for me, came from this
Speaker:feeling of, uh, not enoughness needing to do more, to be more, uh, as opposed
Speaker:to really doing a bit more self-inquiry as to what really lights me up, what
Speaker:gives me energy so that I can be present with the stuff that gives me energy.
Speaker:Whether that's being here on Crowdcast, whether that's creating a curriculum, a
Speaker:new kind of course for our community, or deepening the work that we do with Vision
Speaker:2020, or talking with Laurence about how we can make altitude more impactful.
Speaker:Or joining up with Abby and having really, uh, creative conversations
Speaker:about the new way of taking summer camp.
Speaker:You know, these just to be present with that.
Speaker:As opposed to what's next?
Speaker:What's next?
Speaker:What's next?
Speaker:I think that is, that is the shift in terms of redefining success and it
Speaker:takes work, which isn't just a switch.
Speaker:It's about a little bit of self-knowledge, which only happens when you are, you
Speaker:are around people who allow you to say these things out loud when you try and
Speaker:do this in your head, really difficult.
Speaker:I think super difficult.
Speaker:For those of you who you can, who can do that, great.
Speaker:You probably don't need to be on this call.
Speaker:For, for a lot of us it's like, ah, you is like, you're in this like loop.
Speaker:And then when it comes to impact, this is the thing I really love about all this.
Speaker:What I'm wedd to this idea of effortless impact is this idea that.
Speaker:Particularly at a particular, a certain age where we are, you
Speaker:know, we've been around, we've seen things, we've experienced things.
Speaker:Not only seen things, we've lived things.
Speaker:And to be able to have that lived experience offer real tangible value
Speaker:to other people, I. That for me is amazing because at some point you don't
Speaker:even, you don't want money from that.
Speaker:You just want to, to know that your life mattered because you are sharing
Speaker:what you've been through and how you struggled, or how you've overcome and
Speaker:struggles, or how you've discovered something new or how you've felt
Speaker:something different and that offers something of a shift for someone else.
Speaker:And that to, to offer that shift from a place of abundance because
Speaker:it's just here, this is, this is us.
Speaker:We've just done this.
Speaker:It's not like we're trying to build something or make something.
Speaker:And it's like a scarcity thing.
Speaker:It's like, no, we've lived this.
Speaker:We wanna share that with other people and we have bills to pay.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And this is comes
Speaker:from, this is Us.
Speaker:I think that thing of, this is me, this is us.
Speaker:Like, um.
Speaker:I'm reminded of, I think it was Mattie, the lovely French entrepreneur who
Speaker:joined the program a few years ago, and he, he shared in that quadrant when he
Speaker:was working on the effortless impact, it was, impact by being me like, could
Speaker:I make impact just by being me, like forgetting impact with a big eye, changing
Speaker:the world painting thing, like you said, like changing systems, but like,
Speaker:just by showing up a hundred percent fully as me, maybe that can create
Speaker:ripple effects without me even trying.
Speaker:And to be able to do that is to be able to really tune in with ourselves.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And, and I know like what you said, Carla, this space of not enoughness is
Speaker:so much deeply ingrained, not just within ourselves, but also within our family,
Speaker:within our cultures, within society.
Speaker:So.
Speaker:How do we reconnect to those parts of ourselves that really know how, you know,
Speaker:what value we bring in to the world?
Speaker:And that for me is the deep inner work that's very much needed and that this is
Speaker:also why with the Vision 2020 program, we often say it's an inner and outer work.
Speaker:Um, it's not just about creating a business, but it's
Speaker:also creating a business that really suits you, your values.
Speaker:Your essence, who you are and who you stand for as a person.
Speaker:Around this aspect of.
Speaker:You talked about this, the sort of self-inquiry, the, the not
Speaker:enoughness, um, there are hurdles to get around to to overcome that.
Speaker:There isn't just about a marketing strategy or I know learning to
Speaker:become a public speaker or just necessarily just sort of learning
Speaker:skills for, for building confidence.
Speaker:There's a, like you're talking to this inner journey and I dunno if there's any
Speaker:hurdles that you think people might hit.
Speaker:If they were trying to become this, get into this space of being
Speaker:impact rather than doing impact.
Speaker:Now there's no one ever needs any support.
Speaker:It's all, it's all fine.
Speaker:Everyone's got this sorted.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Uh, I mean the stuff that we come across with all the people we support, I think is
Speaker:all the stuff we've probably either are or have struggled with ourselves in the past.
Speaker:Um, so for me, there's a big part of.
Speaker:Shedding some of the behaviors and the beliefs that aren't
Speaker:helpful to navigate this path.
Speaker:Because, put this way, if this was easy, everyone would do it, right?
Speaker:We'd all, we'd all follow this more, um, holistic view of success, but it's
Speaker:a lot easier to follow the path that societies give for, which is traditionally
Speaker:just, you know, go bigger, go go more, this is more of about, like you said,
Speaker:who am I, like when I say get paid to be me or make impact by being me?
Speaker:We need to know who we are in this, in this world.
Speaker:So a big part of it is understanding what is me and what is things
Speaker:that I've acquired along the way.
Speaker:And it could be hangups about money, like our relationship to money and
Speaker:what we associate to that, how that can mean we tie ourselves to roles
Speaker:and jobs and environments that aren't healthy for us, even if we know that.
Speaker:It's really hard to unpick that.
Speaker:So, I mean, money is a huge thing.
Speaker:Our stories, our relationship to that.
Speaker:Um, but even being visible, like the idea of being me and being
Speaker:visible to the world, uh, make an impact in that way is vulnerable.
Speaker:It's a vulnerable place to be.
Speaker:It's a really rewarding place to be when you, when you can
Speaker:get there, but on your own.
Speaker:I think it could be hard to have that spotlight on you
Speaker:where you say, this is me.
Speaker:You know, take it or leave it.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:That judgment that comes when we put ourselves out there, or the fear of
Speaker:judgment is, is huge for, for people.
Speaker:And it doesn't necessarily mean that.
Speaker:Those judgements, or at least those expectations that we have and expectations
Speaker:that others have totally go away.
Speaker:I think this is also, you know, this is also the myth around, oh, now I know who
Speaker:I am, and then I'll just show up as who I am and I won't encounter any difficulties.
Speaker:I, I like what, uh, Terry already mentioned in the chat of, there's
Speaker:always a recalibration of who am I now?
Speaker:Who am I, five years ago?
Speaker:You know, even a year from now or a month ago, you know, so there's,
Speaker:there's a constant recalibration of are we still, you know, are we
Speaker:still aligned with our values and what we hold dear for ourselves?
Speaker:And if not, you know, how do we hold space for that?
Speaker:Of those changing identities?
Speaker:Those changing priorities, especially when you're transitioning to a
Speaker:different state in life, or, you know, there's, there's other aspects
Speaker:around your life that are shifting.
Speaker:So for me, there's.
Speaker:The, the recalibration is often, uh, a, a space of inquiry of, is
Speaker:this still true for, for myself?
Speaker:And there was a question that I'm using now as my, um, my barometer
Speaker:and this question of are you honoring that which you seek?
Speaker:And for me that that is a, you know, that's a good
Speaker:question to say, Hey, this is.
Speaker:How I'd want to show up, and this is what success means for me.
Speaker:And am I honoring that?
Speaker:You know, am I honoring that in the ways that I engage with others, in the ways
Speaker:that I, you know, talk about myself in the ways that I put out, you know, the work
Speaker:that I want to put out, um, in the world.
Speaker:So for me, having these moments of recalibration is very important.
Speaker:I like what you said is like, what is it?
Speaker:Was it ordering what I seek?
Speaker:Is that what you said, Lana?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And I think one of the challenges that gets in a lot of people's way
Speaker:is they dunno what they're seeking.
Speaker:And this is the work is that it doesn't matter how much support you get with
Speaker:building your business if you're looking for the wrong thing or if you don't
Speaker:believe in the thing that you're seeking.
Speaker:And there's a good chance that it won't succeed or it will succeed in a
Speaker:way that doesn't really benefit you.
Speaker:And we've seen that.
Speaker:We saw that a lot in our agency days, where we would be among other
Speaker:creative people building their creative agencies because they
Speaker:wanted to do amazing creative work.
Speaker:And then where they got to was Feeding the Beast.
Speaker:They'd built this big company, they had all of this staff, they
Speaker:were doing work for Google and Microsoft, et cetera, et cetera.
Speaker:But they were no longer creative people.
Speaker:They were managers, they were school teachers.
Speaker:They were trying to tell people off for doing the wrong thing.
Speaker:And that was that you could see them suffer and, and a number
Speaker:of those agencies folded.
Speaker:The, the, the f the founders just left the bus building, literally.
Speaker:Uh, and so that for me is a. A story of how you can follow a path that is
Speaker:very well defined, that takes you to a place of measurable success, but
Speaker:just doesn't feel successful at all.
Speaker:But then what does it mean to seek what success really means for you?
Speaker:That's, that's the perennial question.
Speaker:I think pe, some pe some of us are really trying to answer.
Speaker:Yeah, and I like what Yvonne said here about, how difficult it can
Speaker:be to detach ourselves from this, this model that is so ingrained in
Speaker:everywhere we look, advertising, all the information we're fed day to day,
Speaker:tells us that there is no other way.
Speaker:And so I. A big part of this for me is, is well, why our community
Speaker:exists really in communities like ours exist, is to surround yourself
Speaker:with people who are challenging this idea of success in this way.
Speaker:Because when you're surrounded by people who are living in a different
Speaker:way, then it, that's the norm rather than the other stuff we're fed.
Speaker:I think if you're the only one who's fighting against this,
Speaker:you feel like a lone wolf.
Speaker:And that's, I think, something we are, um.
Speaker:We've been driven by, since day one, really is to connect people and say,
Speaker:look, someone else like you, even if you don't fix your problem straight
Speaker:away, you've got someone to walk this path with and, and to know that
Speaker:you're not alone in this struggle.
Speaker:And I guess this is also where the, you know, the collective, uh.
Speaker:Vision also comes in right of when, when you're doing things on your own and you
Speaker:have your, you know, definition of success that you would want, it helps to also
Speaker:be surrounded, like what you said, helps to be surrounded with like-minded and
Speaker:like-hearted people of, Hey, this is also what we would want to see in a society.
Speaker:And rather than it just being just, you know, an individual vision.
Speaker:It becomes a collective vision.
Speaker:It becomes a collective, I would know movement of, Hey,
Speaker:this is how we can shift.
Speaker:The different systems and when we, you know, when we get to be in communities of
Speaker:practice, when we get to be in communities or change, we get to really also
Speaker:amplify this work and shift the systems.
Speaker:So for me, I see this as, you know, the ripple effect is not just within
Speaker:who you are, who you're serving, but it's also shifting the systems of
Speaker:the societies that we are part of.
Speaker:who is it?
Speaker:Who coined the term Seniors Laurence, you can remind me.
Speaker:well, I know it's true.
Speaker:Brian Eno, I think it might be Brian.
Speaker:Brian Eno.
Speaker:That's it.
Speaker:Brian Eno.
Speaker:and this idea of the genius that comes from being in a particular scene and that
Speaker:scene being a collective, a space where people think out loud and not to just.
Speaker:Teach or ask people for feedback, is this a good idea?
Speaker:But through that exchange, through that sharing of like a, a seed that then
Speaker:can grow through people's feedback and building on that and, and hearing other
Speaker:people's ideas, that then create basically more abundance in terms of creativity.
Speaker:And finding a place where you can do that, where you don't, and this is
Speaker:the, I would say, one of the contrasts to the definitions of success that
Speaker:we had as an agency versus now.
Speaker:We used to work with people who would make us sign an NDA before we
Speaker:could even learn about their idea.
Speaker:They were so scared that someone was going to steal their idea.
Speaker:And more often than not, well we would.
Speaker:Well we would, but still, more often than not, they would tell us the idea.
Speaker:And A, either we wouldn't uneven understand it, or B, it'd be
Speaker:like, this is not gonna work.
Speaker:But they would hold so tightly onto it that they wouldn't
Speaker:actually test it out in the wild.
Speaker:Yeah, because they were scared.
Speaker:They were scared it was gonna challenge them, and they would then, oh my God, I
Speaker:spend all this time thinking about it.
Speaker:Because of that, they were fixed in this kind of sunk cost fallacy that I
Speaker:cannot let go of this idea and I'm not letting it grow or develop and without.
Speaker:A seniors, you're never gonna have an idea that's really gonna create impact.
Speaker:That's our belief.
Speaker:And also when people asked us to sign those, the first thing I'd say is, well,
Speaker:if we sign it, the first thing we'll get you to do is share this idea with a
Speaker:bunch of people to get feedback on it.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:So it is kind of counterintuitive at the early stage.
Speaker:Um, yeah.
Speaker:But yeah, I totally echo what you've said about.
Speaker:This.
Speaker:So the seniors thing for me is like getting out that guru mindset of like,
Speaker:I know it all, it's all about me.
Speaker:The visionary with my idea.
Speaker:I just need to tell the world about it.
Speaker:Versus actually, there's so much, wisdom in the crowd and
Speaker:the crowd of hearted people.
Speaker:That's the key thing.
Speaker:into this.
Speaker:I think that's
Speaker:a really interesting point there.
Speaker:Because there are situations in our lives, there are times in our lives
Speaker:where not only is time precious in terms of there's only a finite in the amount
Speaker:of time that we have, there's only a finite amount of energy that we have.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I remember when my kids were young, oh my God, I was not necessarily gonna be
Speaker:the most creative person all the time.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And so there's only so much time available.
Speaker:To do things, but at the same time, that was the time when
Speaker:my second daughter was born.
Speaker:That's when, when, uh, the Happy Startup School was born.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So it is possible.
Speaker:We launched at the worst time.
Speaker:Well, I think we launched
Speaker:and we made use of the time we had because there was a clear
Speaker:pull in a certain direction.
Speaker:yeah.
Speaker:And we, and we followed the call.
Speaker:I think, and that's the thing of this stuff is in some ways I. Having young
Speaker:kids, I think, gave me good boundaries.
Speaker:'cause I still wanted to be at home to have lunch with my
Speaker:wife and young son at the time.
Speaker:But it meant that, yeah, we couldn't do it all.
Speaker:So maybe if we had, we'd have worked 24 hours a day because
Speaker:we didn't have young families.
Speaker:Who's to say it would've survived if we'd carried on that road?
Speaker:So, well this conundrum, let's say is, is a common one we come up against, isn't it?
Speaker:Like, it sometimes feels that I wanna do this thing, but time
Speaker:and commitments are stopping me from moving forward on this path.
Speaker:There's two things here for me.
Speaker:One, in terms of our story, it's patience.
Speaker:This is like 13 years ago now.
Speaker:You know, this isn't like an overnight success.
Speaker:It's taken us time to get to where we are now, uh, and that that
Speaker:has its own story attached to it.
Speaker:But this idea of carving out time and headspace to explore me and my impact, it
Speaker:can feel like we don't have enough time.
Speaker:When you do that with a blank page.
Speaker:But if you're given structure, if you're given guidance, you can probably
Speaker:do this work in 15, 20 minutes.
Speaker:It doesn't have to take a whole day.
Speaker:And if you did that 20 minutes a day for a week, there's a
Speaker:lot of clarity you can get.
Speaker:And particularly if you do that with others, When you have people that ask
Speaker:you questions about what it is you're exploring, that gets you outta your
Speaker:own little loop, and you're limiting beliefs about what's possible and
Speaker:what's not and what you are allowed and, and, and even getting inspiration.
Speaker:And, and Carlos, there's also the element of having a safer enough space
Speaker:to unpack also what's, you know, what are the resistance coming, where, where
Speaker:is it coming from, and what would you need to be supported in this resistance?
Speaker:Because yeah, a big part of this is really looking at, you
Speaker:know, what, where, where am I?
Speaker:You know, what am I resisting?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And
Speaker:how can I be supported around it?
Speaker:And you're not al, and that you are not alone with it.
Speaker:This is the biggest problem I think we're trying to solve with what we do, is
Speaker:that all of us are in our heads thinking we are the only idiot thinking this or
Speaker:feeling this or struggling with this.
Speaker:And then you get to a space, everyone it worked out, and you say it out
Speaker:loud, particularly in like a small group, we have six or seven people.
Speaker:Someone says it and suddenly, boom, everyone's shoulders drops.
Speaker:Everyone says, yeah, okay, me too all.
Speaker:Let's move on.
Speaker:But I think another part of this too is.
Speaker:And I think this applies, I'm so sure to the young parents, but
Speaker:especially probably, do I deserve this?
Speaker:You know, do I deserve to devote some time and space for me because
Speaker:I've got other things to do.
Speaker:Maybe older parents, maybe young kids, maybe the job,
Speaker:the household or that stuff.
Speaker:So in some ways, I might come last.
Speaker:And so that feeling of like, actually I deserve this.
Speaker:I deserve to pay attention and give time.
Speaker:To my needs in the midst of all this.
Speaker:And I know, Lana, you've been, well, you've shared a lot about this blogging
Speaker:and through your work about boundaries, particularly for moms and given you a
Speaker:journey with cancer, then you had to put those boundaries in place, right?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah, because there's, you know, the, the more that we are connected
Speaker:with ourselves, then the more that we can be self full and Yeah.
Speaker:And, and we are often given the narratives of, oh, if I, give too much
Speaker:attention to others, then I'm selfish.
Speaker:Uh, I, I'm just selfless.
Speaker:And then if I give too much attention to myself, then I'm selfish.
Speaker:But there is.
Speaker:You know, self fullness of how can we come from a place of wholeness,
Speaker:of fullness so that we don't.
Speaker:Keep on depleting ourselves.
Speaker:And I think that that is a challenge, especially as an entrepreneur
Speaker:and as a mother or a parent.
Speaker:We keep on depleting our resources and how can we resource ourselves with
Speaker:impactful work, with amazing connections, with, uh, a work that feels effortless?
Speaker:And, and this we, you know, we can only do as how we do it.
Speaker:Uh, generations ago.
Speaker:As a tribe, as a community, it's not something that we can do on ourselves.
Speaker:I felt a helpful reframe for me, particularly if you're a people
Speaker:pleaser, is that if I'm not allowed it, why is anyone else allowed it?
Speaker:If I'm not allowed to be selfish, does that mean no one
Speaker:else is allowed to be selfish?
Speaker:Am I so special that I'm not allowed to be selfish and everyone else else can?
Speaker:So you know that whole thing of like, actually I'm not worth it, is then that
Speaker:starts to project, that will eventually project on other people and you'll
Speaker:say that they're not worth it either.
Speaker:Subliminally,
Speaker:so,
Speaker:but it's modeling, isn't it?
Speaker:Offer that,
Speaker:as in Yeah, we've seen people, well I was just thinking it a,
Speaker:mainly as a mental hack, there's the modeling, which is to help other people,
Speaker:but really this is, I believe this is a big blocker for people pleasers.
Speaker:Yeah, because it's like everyone else deserves more than I do.
Speaker:But then not realizing that if you don't allow it for yourself,
Speaker:then you're not necessarily gonna allow it for other people.
Speaker:That's a way to basically turn that weapon on yourself in a sense.
Speaker:Like, no.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:I got, like you said, Laurence, I've gotta model it.
Speaker:I've gotta be able to do it to, so others are allowed as well.
Speaker:oh, oh, we've got a comment here from Yvonne.
Speaker:I just wanna have a quick look at which part of the problem is the
Speaker:range of limiting beliefs we may have absorbed as children, which can be
Speaker:a unseen, and b, deeply embedded.
Speaker:This is the work.
Speaker:This is
Speaker:the work LA like chomping to answer that.
Speaker:Your business school,
Speaker:this is the stuff they don't teach you step program to six figure success.
Speaker:It's like, oh, just flick that switch.
Speaker:No, this stuff is deeply ingrained.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:But if we don't admit it, and if we don't have the courage to share
Speaker:that with others, we will be stuck.
Speaker:it's, it's also a matter of surfacing it in the first place.
Speaker:Uh, sometimes we just don't know what we don't know.
Speaker:And, um, in conversations being in a community, we get to surface certain
Speaker:patterns that are like, oh, wait a minute.
Speaker:That's also the same thing with me.
Speaker:And that.
Speaker:That form of mirroring is so helpful to unpack them and, and to slowly
Speaker:reveal the layers underneath.
Speaker:This is the point of the program where I direct people to Lana, say,
Speaker:you need a one-to-one with Lana.
Speaker:And then they come back typically in floods of tears, good tears, happy tears.
Speaker:Um, just to recap on today in terms of what we're, uh, we were
Speaker:trying to communicate about, um, this idea of redefining success.
Speaker:Uh, the tool that we use on Vision 2020 is called the Success Success Canvas.
Speaker:And the four reframes that we've try, we are trying to get people to
Speaker:think about, is to think about happy money, intentional time, authentic
Speaker:connection, and effortless impact, owning those definitions for themselves.
Speaker:'cause we believe that if you are like us and you want to do work that's
Speaker:more aligned to who you are, these are the four ways to look at success.
Speaker:Uh, and we will share with them this is what we do in the program.
Speaker:We share our definitions and what it means to us and how we've
Speaker:created that in our own businesses.
Speaker:And then we get everyone in the, in the program to share their own so
Speaker:that we can then with this seniors come with more, uh, grounded and
Speaker:personal and authentic definitions so that we can do more of the work.
Speaker:So, uh, take note if you are interested in this work.
Speaker:Uh, and if you want to, if you're curious about the program, if you
Speaker:just want to have a conversation and learn more about it, then go to the
Speaker:website vision, do happy startups.co.
Speaker:You'll find more information about how the curriculum works, and also
Speaker:there's an opportunity to schedule in a call with Laurence and myself so we
Speaker:can just find the fit, so to make sure that, uh, you're in the right place.
Speaker:Thank you everyone.
Speaker:any final words, Lana or Laurence?
Speaker:Ah, I'm just looking forward to seeing the conversations very, very alive,
Speaker:chat conversations, so looking forward for tomorrow around stories of change.
Speaker:Same for me.
Speaker:I think, um, yeah, covered a lot, but I think for me it's just moving on
Speaker:this path towards, towards the thing that, uh, sparks your curiosity or
Speaker:feels more aligned rather than having to change everything from day one.
Speaker:So yeah, not ignoring the feelings or the feels,
